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Letter shows cynics can be charitable

Letter shows cynics can be charitable

A charity shop worker in Belfast got the following reply from the business next door when she wrote to them asking for sponsorship for a charity trek.

“Dear Lz

Thank you for your recent begging letter. Please find enclosed a cheque for £100 (times are tough you know) to fund your wee holiday to China. Personally I think it sounds like lots of fun — I wouldn’t call walking 15k a day ‘vigorous’ but I suppose it might be quite hard for an old doll like you. I will be sure to ask you to contribute towards my next holiday.

We are very happy to support such a deserving charity, but having spoken to my colleagues in the office, we feel we must attach some conditions to this donation:

1. Stop taking our bin

2. Stop borrowing our calculators

3. Refrain from coming into the office for a period of one week. Perhaps then we can get some work done.

4. Whenever you get back, on no account are you to regale us with anecdotes about your time in China. I think I speak for all my staff when I say that I would rather slam my knackers in a car door than listen to you wittering on about the majesty of the Great Wall and the spirituality of mountain solitude.

On a more serious note, we would like to wish you luck for your walk and hope you raise plenty of money for a worthy cause.”

Paul Artherton has a BA (Hons) Degree from Queen’s University and a MA Degree in Journalism from Pennsylvania State University. He has worked in PR and fundraising for over 27 years. Previously assistant director for fundraising and public relations at the Simon Community Northern Ireland for seven years, for the last 17 years he has run his own fundraising consultancy business specialising in fundraising, sponsorship, public relations and recruitment. His clients have included charities, private sector and public bodies. Examples include the Ulster Cancer Foundation, Simon Communities of Ireland, NI Hospice, North and West Belfast Health and Social Services Trust, Aiken Promotions, the Industrial Development Board and the Ulster Museum. He has lectured on voluntary sector management at Queens University Belfast Institute for Continuing Education. Since 2010 Paul has been a lay member of the NI Charity Tribunal.

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